The Lowest Common Denominator

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Mesothelioma Soup?

January 16, 2018


I didn't actually encounter this yesterday, when I was going on about the latest asbestos incident at work, but it's worth noting for posterity. This is a photo I took way back at the end of '16, when I was doing a pretty crap job of updating the Banality. Though, when you get down to it, I suppose I'm pretty crap about updating the Banality overall. I'm trying again, but you know how that goes.

I'm bound to run into something shiny here before you know it, and then I'll be chasing that around for a couple of months. That sorta happened to me with City of Heroes, and now Guild Wars 2, not that I actually have time to play games lately. Heck, my poor Pokémons ™ have all probably starved to death due to inattention over the last year. And this after all those freebie giveaways!

But anyway, I digress. As I do. All too frequently. I simply can't believe that any company proclaiming that it remotely cares about the health and well-being of its employees would leave a big cart covered in friable asbestos powder (see, I was paying attention to all those yearly recertification videos!) just sitting in the middle of a hallway, where it can get blown around when anyone opens the nearby door.

You know, to the outside air. Which would just blow in. And probably did any number of times. Scattering said friable asbestos powder. Everywhere.

But Wait, There's More

January 15, 2018


As I've mentioned once or twice, I work in a lawsuit waiting to happen. The lead maintenance guy head janitor hall monitor loves to get indignant when I mention, repeatedly, how much of a death trap the building we work in is, but yet I keep tripping over safety hazards. And this after they canned the last emergency, health, and safety person and replaced her with someone from corporate.

But these poor simulations of humanoid creatures keep insisting that the place is perfectly safe. Which is why, of course, I saw this parked in front of the door as I left for the day today. Every single time the management proclaims that they've rooted all the 'dangerous' asbestos out of our building, a crew inexplicably arrives a few months later to extract a bit more. It's funny how that works.

But then, the hall monitor loves to hook his buddies up with contract work for the company, when he isn't roaming around flexing in the halls, or trying to get on my last nerve by tattling on me to my boss for my posture being unprofessional or whatever it is that's so clearly vexing his tiny, tiny brain. I wonder if he's just sitting on piles of asbestos to have them come clean up.


January 14, 2018

Yeah, it's winter. Fie.

So two weeks ago, I fell on my posterior and hurt my tail bone a bunch. By and large, however, it has slowly been knitting itself back together, the pain diminishing in almost imperceptible amounts over time. Well, that all changed yesterday, because someone dumped a huge load of snow on us with their Weather Dominator, and I had to shovel it all out of the driveway.

I was actually feeling all right before shoveling, but during, and then after, my ass was on fire. It got to the point that it was throbbing madly and painfully, and I could barely walk it was so bad. Naturally, I had to head to the grocery store to pick up a couple of things afterwards, so I was walking through the Kroger looking like I was ninety years old. Which is about how I felt at the time.

The pounding, pulsating pain slowly eased off, leaving me just a whole lot more sore than I had been only that morning, right around the time we left the sto'. However, things were even more amiss than my broken ass, because at least one of the things we purchased seems to have gotten lost between the cash register and the house... and it's not lost in my car.

Mumble grumble.

Jackassery at the Factory

January 13, 2018

Yesterday was weird. This was the first time since I started working at my current job that the powers-that-be decided to close early, due to weather. The weather hadn't even started yet, but they literally told us to go home at lunch time. And, as I sit here looking out the window on this Saturday morning, only about two inches of snow have fallen from the sky, which were promptly plowed off the roads.

I find this inexplicable because I have driven to work, at this job, during must more challenging weather conditions. Whether they were about to hit, were in process, or had just dumped a metric butt-load of precipitation on the city. And yet, for some reason, the management completely panicked over this latest snowfall. Which was not all that much snow to fall, truth be told.

The worst part about this is that I didn't get paid for the time I didn't work yesterday. Despite them shuttering the building on us, we were not compensated for the time we would have been working, but couldn't because they wouldn't let us. Which cut into the four hours of overtime I worked on Thursday to get a couple more bucks in the bank. Have I mentioned that I hate the management where I work?


Determined to Rule the World

January 12, 2018


So I went into work today, after working a twelve hour shift yesterday, but managed to arrive about ten minutes early. I was impressed by this, as groggy as I was, so I thought I would be productive! Thus, I broke out my laptop and began to engage in the nerd work of the ages, my cleaning up of the last portion of my nerd site that requires it, when my boss rounded the corner into the break room.

"What the hell are you always doing on that thing, anyway?"

I looked at my screen, where I was currently modernizing the role playing game description of a bunch of costumed terrorists' inflatable raft, and then back up at my boss. I was trying to figure out how to explain this without blowing my cover at work, since I have thus far continued the charade that I am one of them, and didn't want to blow it. So, I tried to dodge.

"I'm writing a book."

She then proceeded to ask me about said book, but luckily, since I am kinda sorta writing a book, I could at least fake that. Sure, my writing is not proceeding very quickly, since I'm still on the first few pages, and I'm still trying to find the research material I require without spending several thousand dollars, but I wasn't lying. About writing a book, at least. Even if I wasn't at that moment.

Of course, I was still vague. How do you explain you're writing a modern variation of a seven thousand year old religious text?

Leaping Out Of My Own Skin

January 11, 2018

I've been strangely capable of arriving to work a bit early this year, as opposed to barely clocking in before the horrible 'Kronos' equipment seizes up upon scanning in my time card, and declared that I punched in one minute late. I haven't been any more coherent than I usually am at six in the morning, however, which sort of caused an issue when someone stopped my heart today.

I was actually trying to be productive, and get something done before our ludicrously pointless morning meeting, so I had gone into the back room to mix up some chemical coating that I needed. And, apparently, I was completely into what I was doing, because I had not noticed one of the new guys having walked up next to me, and asking if he could also have some of said chemical coating.

Apparently, despite being six foot five and three hundred pounds of solid Marine, this guy moves like a ninja. Not only did I miss his arrival, neither seeing nor hearing him enter the room, he wandered around me to settle in to the far side of the room, away from any point of ingress or egress. He was just there. And I was so startled that I spilled my chemical coating all over myself.

So now my shirt and my stomach hair glow in the dark. More than usual, at any rate.

One (Hundred) To Grow On

January 10, 2018

Apparently, a Honda ® Fit ™ can travel over one hundred miles per hour in the rain for considerable distances without losing control. I know this, because it took me a while to catch up to the jackass in the penis-extending truck so I could flip him off after he almost ran me off the road for having the temerity to only go three miles over the speed limit in the passing lane.

I also attempted to film his jackassery, but that was hard while maintaining that control.


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